Separation

Imagine an object in space that’s been separated from anything that could cause friction or movement – well, that object will still be in motion. This is the law of conservation of momentum at work, which shows us that it is natural for such objects to be forever in motion without any cause.

Separation is the action or state of moving or being moved apart..
Separation is the division of something into constituent or distinct elements.

Separation can mean many things — from divorce to the absence of a loved one during a leave of duty. Whether you are going through a permanent or temporary separation, you may feel lost to yourself, heartbroken, and disoriented. By taking the time to feel sad, connect with others, and feed your own joy, you will cope effectively with your separation.

Allow yourself to feel what you feel
Let is go the time it goes, there is no time for grief to go.
Remember the good times, allow yourself to have bad days, find your inner peace.
Smile and live your life.

Now after all of this classic selfhelp, what really happened and what can you do?
Yes you have lost her, you will never see her again, the beautiful smile, the giggeling laughter, the talks, the walks, the dreams evaporating, the destinations that you will never go to again , the restaurants that will eternally smell the sad scent of rupture. You tried to save her but you couldn't, you wanted to but you couldn't, she keept on smiling and fighting cheering you through the way but everything comes to an end and here comes separation with all of its capturing emotions, feelings of irreversible loss and damage to the soul. Separation punches your face, and hammers your head and makes you feel irrelevant like one million little pieces floating in a sea if inexistence and hoplessness.
There is nothing you can do to get your loss back, the time that will never come again, the hurt emotions, the miserable tears and the mountain of existential vaccum that cripples your soul.
You can't get her off your mind, you just can't let go and move forward.

Your moments are what you take from your life, this why photography is the art of preserving moments which will never comeback and this is the nature of life, you have to accept your feelings, absorb reality and live through your moments like a moments in photos, whenever you are missing, get into your memory and roll your imsgination on, get the beautiful moment out, enjoy it and move on through the tough reality for the sake of fulfilling your life purpose and for the sake of love, pure love

The power of Concentration

You Can Do It  if You  Believe You Can

Concentration is the act of focusing the mind upon a given desire until  ways and means for its realization have been worked out and successfully  put into operation.

First is forming a habit which is a mental path that your actions have gone through several times. You have to remove the obtacles, pave the mental path and then travel it while  forgetting the temptations of the old habits. It not who you are , it is who you become.

Next the environment, you have to immerse yourself in books, attend conferences, community, relevant news, socialmedia and have the relevant training within your area of concentration. Your environment will help you in attracting the right ideas and tools necessary to accomplish your definite chief aim. Your environment is a magnet that helps in turning your dreams into reality. Surround yourself with people who inspire you.

Concentration is the ability to keep your mind and expertize on the subject until you finally master it.
Control your attention and focus on a problem until you solve it.

In order to ignite your concentration, you have to restore your ambition and desire. See yourself 5 or 10 years from now, where do you want to be ? Where are your dreams? Do you still have any? There is nothing that can make up a lost imagination.

Get the magic key of concentration, one thing at a time, one step at a time, quit living in the past and the days that would never return.
Re-create yourself!

Can you buy happiness ?

Can you buy happiness ?
You can’t become happy through external things like success or wealth. It’s only by looking inside yourself that you can find real joy

Happiness is thought as a momentary, fleeting feeling. The intensity and duration depend on circumstances outside their control.

Real, profound happiness is something more: it comes with having a healthy state of mind.

The way you think, live and perceive the world around you has a major impact on your mental well-being.

Seek happiness within yourself, not from the outside world.

You can’t buy happiness. In fact, external factors in general have a limited impact on happiness. Wealth and social status do have some effect on your happiness, but they only account for about 10 to 15 percent of it.

Happiness would be out of reach if it was purely an external phenomenon. After all, our desires know no limits; the amount of control we have over the world, in contrast, is very limited.
Consider love, for example. There’s no way to ensure that your lover will always love you back. So if your happiness depends on that, you’re setting yourself up for disappointment and heartbreak.
A person might get excited about buying a new car, for example, only to have that joy squashed when a newer model comes out. That’s what happens when you seek happiness in the outside, instead of focusing on your inner being.
When you have an interior life,” she wrote, “it certainly doesn’t matter what side of the prison fence you’re on.”
Happiness is not the same thing as pleasure.
Long-lasting happiness shouldn’t be confused with pleasure. A lot of people assume that fame or wealth would bring them all they desire, but such things offer only short-term satisfaction and won’t have much influence on your well-being.
Suffering is universal and unavoidable, but that our pain doesn’t actually stem from the suffering we experience. Rather, it stems from the unhappiness we create.
Free yourself from your own ego.
A person who clings to a specific self-image will do anything to make sure that that image is recognized and accepted.
Real confidence and inner peace can only be achieved through egolessness.
Detaching from your ego makes you less vulnerable and gives you inner strength, putting you on the path toward true, profound happiness
Thoughts and emotions can be your best friends – but they can also be your worst enemies.
Examine your negative thoughts and emotions so you can overcome them and achieve inner peace.
You can only understand your negative thoughts by thinking deeply about their roots. You’ll be able to deconstruct them and see that, at the core, they don’t have any substance.
Achieving long-lasting happiness is hard work. It requires overcoming your ego, reconciling yourself to negative emotions, reorienting your world view and re-examining the definition of concepts like “happiness” and “pleasure.” You can’t do those things overnight, but if you stay dedicated to the path, you can bring yourself to a high sense of sukha – an achievement much more fulfilling than any temporary pleasure you might get from wealth or fame.

Practice Gratitude
Love and accept yourself
Learn to let go
Live in the now
Embrace uncertainty
Proritize your health
Take time to play

Reference Happiness by Matthieu Ricard, blinkist.
http://blinki.st/fea8a39b1243?chapter=56b8a8cdd119f90007000014

Confidence is Capital

The day you start trusting yourself is the day you start living.

According to Napoleon Hill, There are six fears in life that you should master in order to have the ultimate confidence:
-Fear of poverty: you will not starve
-Fear of ill health: exercise
-Fear of old age: age is a number
-Fear of criticism: find merit in criticism
-Fear of loss of love: keep your doors open
-Fear of death: value each day of your life

Our decisions shape our destinty, each and every little decision, the decision what to eat, who to marry, where to work, the sort of career you have, whether to have a startup or remain as an employee, each and every decsion has consequences on the short term and long term. So, what's new about this? There is a fine line that connects your self confidence and your ability to make decisions, when life is happening, you trust that everything is falling into place and that you are that incredible genius that the world awaits, that you really matter in history and all of this self agrandizing things. When you just fall back according to some mispriced values, you start to have doubts about your capabilities and you start to overthink and your actions become paralysed.

Why do we all fall sometimes into the trap that we can control the boat through controlling the river flow and direction? We can't actually control the intensity of the journey nor the exact direction, we try to sail but we have to remain open to new possibilities that our own life self perceived drift has created. As long as we trust ourselves that we can be wrong and that most people are wrong most of the time, we will be able to entertain ideas critically and more objectively , we will take off the burden of the daily decision making and focus on what really matters which is the quality of our life jouney, not the destination.
Trust your ability to sail, embrace yourself in making mistakes and never lose trust in your ability to live and make decisions. Live it!

Find Yourself

Finding yourself could be a very interesting question.

Is it about finding your existing self or the self you aspire to have? What are the values that make you , what values are holding you back? Is your self stable or dynamic, is it stagnant or flowing? What is your core? What do you do on daily basis that goes along your self values, what else stems from your aspiring selves? How some of your actions contradict all aspects of the self?

The self is like a house that has values as foundations while expanding on building bricks each and every day through small acts with people that finally build you into who you aspire to be. A self full of energy keeping the right energy and learning in.
The relationship with the self shouldn't be a love hate relationship, it is a long term relation where you accept your limitations, pour energy on your seeds of growth and allow yourself to flourish and become a better person.

Please escape any label that limits you; you are not old, age is a number, you are not broke, money is an idea, if you are single , life is not marriage.
You are not the type of person who gets annoyed easily, you have just become that and by being loyal to your assumed self, you keep on interacting the same way.

Your view of yourself will expand with your connection to the world and other humans through small acts of goodness, write a blog and send it to your close friends, smile, ask about a friend or relative, try to help someone ir do a free service today, it will definitely enrich your day and add one brick at a time for your future self.

Today, be the joy to the world and try to conceptualize the concept of self from an ego-driven to a reality-driven mindset through your small acts, and if you can't do anything, just smile and you will have a better day

You are a Baby

You are a Baby.

Yes you are, each and everyone has baby inside him/her that has never grown up.

A baby who looks for recognition, a baby who looks for love, acceptance, cheering, delight and pampering.
A baby who wants someone to pick him/her up whenever it falls, a baby who wants a hand for calm, a baby looking for someone to dry the tears and wash away the fears.
You can sometimes go emotional about something and cry over it , whether it is a lover, a business opportunity or big toy like a car or diamond ring! You just can't let it go.

An expansive angle is to enjoy your baby mentality and use the enthuthiasm which is a driving force behind your creativity and mind enriching activities while getting more self control about your crying episodes.
Also.critically, try to understand the elevator's ups and downs by enjoying the ride and being less critical of yourself and those around you.

Babies teach through their creative genius and their deep concentration and undivided attention while doing one thing at a time.

Learn to explore the new, make multiple combinations,make mistakes and keep pushing forward like a baby.

There is no stronger lesson in life than seeing a baby learning to walk, the baby tries, falls, again and again in patience resilience until the baby finally walks. The baby never loses hope and knows it will rise in the end.

Enjoy the baby within you.

Message of Gratitude

"The goodness of human nature is like water tending to flow downward. Just as there is no water that does not flow downward, there are no humans who do not have Goodness".

So proud of my mother; a real fighter, lived her life with a strong spirit, was never afraid of death, was appreciating the gift of life each and every day, giving support to her family and friends and never complaining. The beautiful free spirit will always live in each and everyone they have had a trace with, a smile, an advice, a warm welcome, real sincerity and real gratitude and gratification.
The charm, niceness, unconditional love and beautiful heart and soul will live forever,
I would like to thank you for always being inspiring, with your strength,your wisdom, your humour, your charm, your intelligence and you wit. You always stood by me and you are always my last escape. Your tenderness and foresight are always amazing. Your smile is the most amazing with a lot of confidence and hope.

Today one month after you are gone to a better place, I write this message of gratitude for you and all of my family and friends creating a message of love and hope to help maintain your spark as per your life time values.

Always open up for those who support you , remember when you moved through dark times, when in most in need, those who always noticed the positive about you , took care of you, enjoyed your sheer presence, made contribution with their time, gave genuine advice, stood by each other and reflected on you.

The time of challenge brings light, people sit together, talk with each other , cry with each other, and light the flame with each other. Just be there.

The small acts you make in everyday life can have huge impact on the lives of many though it might look traditional or less exciting.
Always see the positive in everyone and everything, be less critical of situations and embracing of people.

May you be happy
May you be safe
May you be at peace
Love you

Your Spark will Always Live.

Expand Your Boundaries

The world offers different perspectives to different eyes. In order to expand your mind, you have to have to try to see the world differently, imagine you are an old man, you will see the world differently from a toddler, each has the same tool, the eyes and they are both in the same place but they see the world differently. The old man sees a restaurant where he used to hang out with his beloved,  a flowers shop where he used to get her flowers, a walk tbrough where they used to walk together embracing winds of change, intellectual conversations and life hopes.
The child sees the toy shop , his mind wanders around choclate and the immense pleasure and instant gratification the child will get after eating the chocolate fountain.

Today use the same as-if mindset while you have your normal walk, see the world as an old man, see it as a child, see it a married, see it as single, see it as rich,see it as poor, see it as healthy and see it as sick, just as you go along your way, try to change your perspectice continiously, don't limit yourself with one view, wear different lenses and see how this would magnify your experience of the world. It will help you enrich your life and push the boundaries of your existential life9
When we think our perspecrives are universal
We close our minds to different perspectives (The Path)

Will you try not trying?

Life is about trying and failing over and over again.
Whatever bad the situation is, you keep on trying, you lose your job keep trying, you lose your love , you keep trying, you get sick and you keep trying. The trying mantra has become the soundtrack of many of our lives. The decision to give up is as tough as the decision to keep on trying, this paradox paralyses a lot of lives and delays a lot of important decisions.

How can we resolve this trying or giving up paradox?

1- What' s the decision? Is it based on facts or information? If it is based on facts , we can classify facts into important and unimportant; we can disregard information as noise.

2- What values do you use? What sort of metric are you giving to the decision? Are you checking all the angles and do you have the right metric? Does it fit how you want to see your lifelong legacy? Is it useful,or is it fake?

3- Is it worth your time and effort? There are always  different options, you may have to expand your angles to view the decision from different perspectives? Nothing is absolute and nothing is definitive, everything changes and life doesn't follow a linear path, what you love today might ruin you tomorrow and today's struggle might be tomorrow's salvation.

As per Trying Not to Try Book:  In the Chinese conception, you’re encouraged to move with ease throughout life, avoiding any difficulties that might harm your spirit.

Well, Chinese philosophers have a word for this experience – wu-wei. Pronounced “oooo-way,” it roughly translates as “effortless acting.”

Another Chinese approach stop trying to be a specific way, to forget all you’d learned and connect with a raw version of yourself
The only way to wu-wei was to do absolutely nothing
thinking less with the conscious mind and more with the unconscious

You need to guide your whole life by the principle of generosity and dedicate yourself to it in everything you do.

Focus to the present and try to simply notice the moment and avoid analyzing your every thought and action.

Decisive book indicated We think narrowly; we’re biased by previous choices, personal values and short-term emotions; and we’re overconfident about our decisions.

Opportunity Cost is what you give up when you make your choice, it is not just yes or no, it could a set of many other options that you can expand your mind exploring if you have the time,just find the golden balance between the value of optionality and falling in the paradox of choice.

You are not special as you think you are and many people have previously solved similar problems, this also means that you are not cursed or something and that things are just the way they are because of a big picture reason, so why not reserach a role model which can guide you in your decision to try or not to try?

In sum, take it easy in yourself as most of your overthinking will not affect your life in 10 years but rather your actions will determine your future, just value the time and energy you are willing to put through the different angles of your decision making  before the pursuit of "Never Give Up" or "Don't Try".

Reference:
Decisive by Chip and Dan Heath on Blinkist.
http://blnk.to/bee88007
Trying Not to Try by Edward Slingerland on Blinkist.

http://blnk.to/1045947f

Don't Let Yourself Down

One step at a time,one breath at a time, one smile at a time and take it easy on yourself. The more you seek positivity the more negative you will become , don't run after success or you will keep feeling as a failure. Don't seek love and  acceptance in otherwise you will feel lonely and rejected.
Stop looking for positivity and be comfortable with yourself and open to the world as always, it is surprising to let yourself down that you let your emotions control your thoughts and make you feel bad, emotions are just emotions, let them fly in the air
like bubbles and let them go.

Life will have its ups and down as if you are an elevator operator so live with it and take the bumps of change.
The transformation you want and that frustrates you will happen eventually, just give life a chance to unfold and stop trying to force life as life needs to blossom on its own and its pace.
Tip of the day: Stop thinking and enjoy the next breath you take and unchain yourself from hopes, expectations and the past, just take a breath and feel the beauty within you now .
The day you start trusting yourself is the day you start living

Think "As If"

Everything slowly becomes something or part of something else, the baby becomes a boy and the boy becomes a man and the man becomes an old man and the old man becomes a soul.

To manage the change in our lives we have keep an open mind to the world and adopt an "as if" mindest.
The "as if" mindset unblocks the brain's creativity from the existing reality and helps creating the first step of change and transandence.

Let's go through different examples of "as if" situations:

You are overweight , you can't control your food intake as you can't control your thoughts and you spontaneouty eat as you see food, how would the "as if" mindset help you?
How if you act "as if" you are in control, you would ask yourself "I am I eating out of emotion or out of hunger"? You would then trigger self control each time you eat brainlessly.
If you act "as if" you are an athlete, you would avoid unnecessary processed food and eat healthy real food.

What if you just lost a loved one? The "as if" mindset will help you think that you are still acting as if your loved one is still here watching you and would enjoy your thriving and success, you will not let the loved one with deterioration and self pity, they would love to see you strong and you have to create the alternative reality that helps you achieve.

What if you are getting older or sick and think that life is slipping drop by drop from your hand, why don't you think "as if" age is a number and that you are healthy "as if" you have all the time in the world to do whatever you want.
The "as if" mentality will help you in getting clarity on how you unlock your mind and potential, forget your past and create a new reality where you are free.

If you are facing a struggle or a failure in your life, accept it and don't try to change it as trying and failure makes you tired and exhausted. The next step after not trying is creating an "as if" mindset which would help in accepting reality while slowly making ever lasting transformative change .